All I can say is WOW

So I went to bible study tonight with great anticipation to what God would teach me and I found something even better...a story to strengthen my faith in my great God. There are many days when I look at my life and wonder if I'm crazy for starting over with two new little kids. I remember the days when the girls were young and I had enough energy for whatever they would throw my way. The one thing I regret is that I lacked the patience I needed to take care of them. Now with Darius and Cynthia I wish I had more energy many days, but the one thing I have now is patience. Darius does things to my house that I would have had a nervous break down years ago.
So tonight while I was at bible study I met a women who was going to have her first baby in January. This may not seem like much except for the fact that she is 45 years old. She has been married for 22 years and is now having their first baby. She talked a little about the pregnancy and how easy the pregnancy has been so far. I could hardly believe it. She then told me she was having a boy. All I could think about then is how Darius climbs on my table, and takes all the pillows off the couch to jump on, and runs around the house with swords, and gets his own milk out of the refrigerator and pours it into his sisters tea cups and on and on. I just smiled at her and told her "the good thing is when you're older you have a lot more patience" :)

I'm amazed at how God can bless a family who has wanted a baby for such a long time.
I'm amazed at how God can use one women to help me be so greatful for all he has given me. I'm so blessed with a Great Husband, 5 wonderful kids, and great friends.
Wow God You're Amazing.

Thomas The Train

Having raised 3 girls this boy thing is very weird to me. My son has been carrying around a picture of a Thomas the train for 3 days now. I finally decided that I would take him to Toy R Us to pick out his first Thomas the Train. Was I in for a surprise. I really needed to take a course on Thomas before entering the store. It took us almost an hour to pick out one train. Why you may ask? Well, I found out today that not all trains go with all tracks, and the plastic trains are not compatible with the wooden tracks, but the imagination station trains and tracks are compatible with all Thomas the Train. The plastic tracks and metal trains are good but not built well. The wooden tracks and trains are all hand crafted and built to last. (Breathe)

So as you can see it was much more than just going and buying a train and leaving..it was an adventure to the other side. The side I now visit often "planet boy". The more I go, the more I'm liken it.

Everyone should have at least one boy. They are so different, so cool and so worth all the messes.

Where do I go from here?

Wow, you spend 18 years raising your children and then within a couple of weeks they can pack up all they have and leave for college. Something happens inside a mom when this happens. I have tried to channel the great amount of saddness that I feel to God daily. I wonder sometimes if I'm the only one who has had this much trouble letting go of her children. I'm the mom who cried almost everyday when she had to send her baby girls to kindergarten. Maybe there is something wrong with me :)

So here I am one month down and my baby girl would like for her mom to tell her "just come home". My outgoing, happy go lucky baby girl misses her mommy. So what did I tell her when she called telling me "if I had gas money and my car was working I would come home right now?" I said NO, you have to stay at least one year.

What? Am I crazy!

No I'm not crazy, I'm just finding out that being a mom is a tough job that does not stop. I love my kids more than I could ever explain. Actually I can tell you how much I love them...I'm willing to let go and let God. Sounds cheesy right? It's not. I love Kristie so much that I'm willing to say no you can't come home even if you beg, because God has a bigger plan for you.

Wow, that is the toughest thing I've had to do.

What now?

What's next?

I don't know, but I do know that my God will be right beside me, because without him I have no idea what I would do.