Raising Arrows

I guess it seems that I been blogging a lot about my kids.  Guess what today is no different.  I was reading a blog tonight that was taking about raising kids and how difficult it can be.  Believe me after 8 hours in my office with both my little kids with me I know about difficult.  I want to love bring my kids to work.  I want to think good thoughts about working at a church where they allow me to be a working mom and a take your kids to work mom.  I love my kids.  I love spending time with them, but some days, like today, I come home very tired and worn out.   


Then it dawns on me.  I'm not just raising kids, I'm raising arrows.  Right now these arrows can not go far.  I want to raise my son to be a light for Christ.  I want him to lead his family the way the Lord instructs him.  I want Cynthia to be a modest, totally in love with her savior, beautiful women.  I'm raising arrows that will one day shot off into the world to shine their light for Christ.  That is my job!  That is my God given, God ordained role to my children.  


Yes it is hard.  Yes is making me gray headed.  Yes I wonder sometimes if I'm doing the right think, and then I realize that yes this is my season, this is my life, this is where I want to be.


May the kids that leave the Livingston home be lights to this world and look to God for His direction in their lives as they leave our home.

Bible Thumping Momma

Well, I went to bible study tonight and enjoyed myself very much. I enjoy studying God's word. It never fails me what God shows me every time I open his word. I also get to take my baby girl, Keisha with me. I never want my kids to look back on their upbringing and wonder whether their mom was a women who studied her bible. I have decided that I want to be the mom that when I die my kids put on my tomb stone "Here lies our Bible Thumping Momma".

Ta-Da

Well, the time has finally come....Potty Training. So lets be honest what do I know about training a boy? Nothing. If you don't open the leg right guess what happens? Yep pee come straight out all over the innocent person in front of him. Did you realize that you can train a boy two ways, stand up or sitting down. Did you know that a person can buy items that can be place in the bottom of the toilet as targets for little boys to practice their aim. When ever he hits his sister he does not seem to have a problem with aim, but with toilet training he has no accuracy.

So we have all the items we need: pull-ups, big boy under wear, 2 potties one for home one for work, a toilet seat that sits inside a adult seat, kando wipes, and disinfecting wipes and a potty training book that offers me no good information. I'm ready to go. Darius has been going potty ever hour for 4 days now.

He has had several ups and downs but the funniest story happened right at the beginning. We got ready to take Darius to the potty and as we are going down the hall I'm explaining what he needs to do when we get into the bathroom. he seems to understand completely. Darius sits down on the Elmo potty push out 3 drops of pee looks up at me with a huge grin on his face, with hands raised up and says "Ta-Da". Watching as this boy's brain develops I am beginning to understand a lot about the opposite sex.

Any Given Day

At the Livingston's house you can find us doing just about anything.  I try and have my camera available to take picture all the time because you never know what I might snap a shot of.  Here are a few pictures I have taken lately.  

Cynthia is so silly.  She loves Dora and loves to wear D's trick or treat bag on her head.

Dress up has come to be the kids favorite things to do.  

Iron-man with a Pickle.  

Are those Santa Cookies

So with Christmas gone I have sat back and thought about some of the memories that have just made my laugh from the inside out. One of my favorite stories happened with Darius after Christmas day. Not a day goes by that I don't sit back and laugh at something that boy says or does.

Christmas Eve Darius made cookies to leave out for Santa. He was very excited to sit with his Nene (AKA Kristie) and put the cookies on the pan. He made sure to make chocolate chip cookies, because he heard from a source close to Santa that they are his favorite. With done and on the plate Darius left the cookies for the white bearded man. The next morning, at the the surprise of Darius, the cookies were gone. In fact, Santa even left him a little note and drew him a picture. That little boy could not be happier.

Several days letter Kristie decided to made some cookies late at night for a little snack. Darius got up the next morning and walk into the kitchen, where Kristie left the cookies out on the pan, and with a big smile and great excitement he said "are those Santa cookies". Sadly we had to say no.

2009

Wow I can hardly believe that it is now 2010. I love that we get to enter a new year with great anticipation of what our great God is going to do. I look back on 2009 and can not believe how much our family has changed and how much God has blessed the Livingstons. Here is just a few of the things that happened this year

Jelissa: In July the oldest of the Livingston clan moved out and into her own apartment. She decided to not go to college this year but rather take a year off. She worked at Safeway and learned that she can spend just as much as she earns :) Jelissa learned may lessons this year but has learned that staying close to the Lord is one decision that she will never regret. Jelissa always challenges me and pushes buttons with me that I never even knew I had but my life would never be complete without her. She is a great girl with great life ahead of her.

Kristie: Well, in August I had to do one of the things I never thought I could do..I let my little girl go off to college. I cried almost all the way home wondering about how I had just had a piece of my heart torn out of my body and left in another state. Kristie missed home just as much as she was missed. I received a phone call everyday and enjoyed many hours of conversation with her while she was gone. I found that the relationship that was developing with my little girl was one that was going to be deeper more real than anything I could imagine with one of my girls.

Lakeisha: has been my right hand girl since the twins moved out. I look at Keisha daily and wonder if she could possibly get any more beautiful. She has a personality that that is so strong. She is a girl who knows what she wants and goes for it. She has acted in several plays this year and went away to become a California girl last summer. She came back more grown than when she left. She can definitely handle what ever comes her way. She is now getting ready for college and is so ready to made the transition. She is as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside. I could not be more proud of the way she handles herself and how she always looks to make those around her better and does not look to tear down She is a blessing to out family that is worth its weight in gold

Darius: My hands would get tired typing about this precious little boy. He brings more joy to our family than we could have ever anticipated. I look at that boy everyday and wonder why God loves me so much that He allows me to be his mother. He has so much energy and so much excitement for the world that we can hardly keep up. He has learned to that being polite gets him almost everything he wants. He tells all his sisters and mom and dad daily that he loves them more than the moon. He is a snugly boy who loves trains, and was excited that Santa brought him one.

Cynthia: This little girl is so sweet and so loving that it hard to believe that she is my little girl. Cynthia has learned so much from her brother that on some days I want to slow her growth down. She has grown up so much this year. She learned to walk and is now beginning to talk. She has taken stake on her daddy's heart and yells at Lakeisha when she sits on his lap. She does not like her daddy to come into a room without picking her up. Our family would not be complete without her.

David: David is truly is the best husband ever. He is the best dad I know and is very active in our family lives. In addition to working full time in the computer world David is right by my side as I work in children's ministry. David is a blessing from the Lord. I can't imagine my life without him. I feel so blessed with all that the Lord has done for me and my family. I am excited to see what the Lord is going to do in 2010.

My God Dream in 2010 is that me and my children will continue to grow closer to the Lord and will live our lives so that others will question us....and then we can tell them about our great God.

Is that dinosaur Green or Blue???

I love going to church with my family. I love meeting with my church family. My son loves going to church and asks daily if we are going to see Betty(Barry) or Aaron. He loves snacks and Jesus, which he tells me after leaving church almost every Sunday. Well, this little boy has a mind that works very differently than my 4 girls.
As we were coming home from church today we passed a Sinclair gas station with a big green dinosaur out front. Being a good mom, not wanting my precious son to miss the green dinosaur I say to him "D" there is a green dinosaur over there. He looks very excited outside his window and than turns to me and says, its not green. For the next 2 minutes I basically argue with my 2 year about the color of the dinosaur.
I finally started acting like the adult and just quit talking. After about 30 seconds D says "its not blue mommy right".
I can not ever get enough of that boy. He is always making me laugh and think. He is smarter than I think any 2 year old should be. I can't believe how much I love that boy. He is truly a blessing from God to David and I.

Thanksgiving Week

Wow Thanksgiving rocked. Kristie was home from college and the family was "one" again. Kristie brought home 4 kids plus Dillion from Ozark for Thanksgiving. Lonzo came into town and fit into our family routen like he lived with us all his life. The boys Skyler and Nolen were so fun to hang out with. These boys love the Lord and live for Him in actions, and words. It was fun to just hang out and eat, talk, play rock band, and worship the Lord together. Thanksgiving Day Lonzo did a devo and Nolen lead worship and for over an hour we just talked and song thanksgiving to out Lord and Savior. It was one of the best Thanksgiving I can remember. God has been so good to my family and I could not stop thanking about how "Great is our God".

Rock Band

Lonzo has won the hearts of my children. Cynthia thinks he is the best thing since bananas, and she loves bananas. He was trying to jam with the kids. They had a full band...Cynthia our singer, Darius our drummer, and the fearless leader Lonzo. The kids had a great time. They loved hanging out and playing. I finally pulled Cynthia and Darius away so that I could read to them, put pjs on and put them to bed at a reasonable time. Life is good

Am I willing to give it all up?

Have you ever sat back and wondered if God is telling you something that you're not sure you really want to hear or that you can do...
I have been listening to God whisper in my ear "Monica are you willing to give it all up"? I keep telling Him I am, but am I .
I have been listening for two weeks at church to families that are adopting children from Africa. I don't feel God is calling David and I to adopt kids from Africa but I do feel that God is calling.
I see ....babies, toddlers, older kids
I see ....those who give up their lives, their comfortable American lives, to do whatever it takes to help these kids
"Monica are you willing to give it all up"?
Am I?

Harvest Fest

Yes I know this is past due but better late than never :)

Darius was so excited to be a cowboy. He looked so cute running around with his cowboy outfit on. Cynthia was the cutiest cow ever. She won the hearts of all who saw her.

Kristie was home and enjoyed hanging out with friends and her sisters.

Joe was a graduate. She was lovin on the cow whenever she got a chance. She loves her sister.

All I can say is WOW

So I went to bible study tonight with great anticipation to what God would teach me and I found something even better...a story to strengthen my faith in my great God. There are many days when I look at my life and wonder if I'm crazy for starting over with two new little kids. I remember the days when the girls were young and I had enough energy for whatever they would throw my way. The one thing I regret is that I lacked the patience I needed to take care of them. Now with Darius and Cynthia I wish I had more energy many days, but the one thing I have now is patience. Darius does things to my house that I would have had a nervous break down years ago.
So tonight while I was at bible study I met a women who was going to have her first baby in January. This may not seem like much except for the fact that she is 45 years old. She has been married for 22 years and is now having their first baby. She talked a little about the pregnancy and how easy the pregnancy has been so far. I could hardly believe it. She then told me she was having a boy. All I could think about then is how Darius climbs on my table, and takes all the pillows off the couch to jump on, and runs around the house with swords, and gets his own milk out of the refrigerator and pours it into his sisters tea cups and on and on. I just smiled at her and told her "the good thing is when you're older you have a lot more patience" :)

I'm amazed at how God can bless a family who has wanted a baby for such a long time.
I'm amazed at how God can use one women to help me be so greatful for all he has given me. I'm so blessed with a Great Husband, 5 wonderful kids, and great friends.
Wow God You're Amazing.

Thomas The Train

Having raised 3 girls this boy thing is very weird to me. My son has been carrying around a picture of a Thomas the train for 3 days now. I finally decided that I would take him to Toy R Us to pick out his first Thomas the Train. Was I in for a surprise. I really needed to take a course on Thomas before entering the store. It took us almost an hour to pick out one train. Why you may ask? Well, I found out today that not all trains go with all tracks, and the plastic trains are not compatible with the wooden tracks, but the imagination station trains and tracks are compatible with all Thomas the Train. The plastic tracks and metal trains are good but not built well. The wooden tracks and trains are all hand crafted and built to last. (Breathe)

So as you can see it was much more than just going and buying a train and leaving..it was an adventure to the other side. The side I now visit often "planet boy". The more I go, the more I'm liken it.

Everyone should have at least one boy. They are so different, so cool and so worth all the messes.

Where do I go from here?

Wow, you spend 18 years raising your children and then within a couple of weeks they can pack up all they have and leave for college. Something happens inside a mom when this happens. I have tried to channel the great amount of saddness that I feel to God daily. I wonder sometimes if I'm the only one who has had this much trouble letting go of her children. I'm the mom who cried almost everyday when she had to send her baby girls to kindergarten. Maybe there is something wrong with me :)

So here I am one month down and my baby girl would like for her mom to tell her "just come home". My outgoing, happy go lucky baby girl misses her mommy. So what did I tell her when she called telling me "if I had gas money and my car was working I would come home right now?" I said NO, you have to stay at least one year.

What? Am I crazy!

No I'm not crazy, I'm just finding out that being a mom is a tough job that does not stop. I love my kids more than I could ever explain. Actually I can tell you how much I love them...I'm willing to let go and let God. Sounds cheesy right? It's not. I love Kristie so much that I'm willing to say no you can't come home even if you beg, because God has a bigger plan for you.

Wow, that is the toughest thing I've had to do.

What now?

What's next?

I don't know, but I do know that my God will be right beside me, because without him I have no idea what I would do.

Fun at the Zoo

I believe that the purchase of our membership at the zoo is the best thing we buy every year for our family. It is so nice to be able to just go walking around looking at all the animals. Darius is so excited this summer about the zoo. His favorite "zoo sister" Jelissa takes him several times a month. I enjoy the time I get to go and watch his face light up. He loves to make animal sound all the time so when he gets to see the animals up close it just tickles him. I love to watch his face light up when he feeds the giraffes. Our greatest memories will always and forever be when Darius grabbed the giraffes lips and pulled them to him. I almost died. It was the funniest thing ever.

I never thought I would be the kind of mother that enjoyed the zoo. The girls and I went maybe once a year when they were growing up. Now I go once a month all year long, and sometimes more. It is interesting to see what a different mother I am to the little kids. I have so much more patience, I just wish I had the energy I did with the girls. You win some you loss some. I'm still learning balance.

Zoo Day With the Meridian Staff

We always have so much fun together

On this particular day David had to work so he was unable to join us :(

Wednesday at the Park

We have so much enjoyed going over to the farmers market on Wednesdays at the America the Beautiful park. They are having concerts in the park from 6 to 8 pm every Wednesday in July. We have enjoyed eating great food, listening to the music and allowing Darius to play in the water. He loves walking around in the water and playing with all the kids. The water is very cold so I decided that I would be the official picture taker and have someone else go in the water with him. We have touch Cynthia's feet in the water but she has let us know right away that she does not like the "Cold" water.

My goal has been to have the kids out of the house doing activities geared toward them a couple times a week. The evenings in the park have been fun for the whole family. David meets us down town and if the girls can they join us too. Besides what we by from the farmers market it is a free activity. I'm always looking for ways to have good family fun, for next to nothing. This is one that I would recommend.

"My Guy"

As the day ends and the kids sleep I sit back and thank God for a great day with my family.
This is the first fathers day without my dad. I miss him which is not something I ever really thought I would say. He is I hope and pray in heaven with My Great God.
When I think about "My Guy" David I feel so blessed to have such a great husband and a great father for my children.
On many days David will work all day long and then come home to a family that needs his attention, things in the house that need to be fixed, dogs needing water, and a wife needing a sounding board about the day. He always has time for his family even when he is tired from working all day.
God gave me the best gift 5 plus years ago..."My Guy" David. I love him more than he will ever know.
My kids are so blessed to have him as their dad.

Nervous Break Down

Well, I have officially started having a nervous break down.

Lakeisha left for California today and will not come home until late July early August...I can not believe I agreed to that.

Jelissa is moving out July 1st to her very own place. I honestly believed she would be the kid I would have had to kick out of the house. She and I have been joined at the hip since her birth. It will seem like a piece of me is leaving. Oh wait a piece of me is leaving. I'm excited for her but will miss her lots. She is my oldest but still my baby girl. She has grown up and I have grown up with her. I was only 19 when I had them and had no clue what I was doing. With Jelissa and I being a lot alike we've butted heads a lot and I have read lots of books to help me along. I am excited to see what the next chapter of our lives will be. Watching our relationship turn from being the one telling her how and when to do things to watching her make her own decisions. I pray God will continue to give me patience as I learn to watch as sometime my baby girl falls and I can't just step in and fix it.

Kristie has decided to go to Ozark Christian College. She will be leaving the 2nd week in August. I will watch the happiest child I know leave my home and embark on the great adventure of college. Although I will be sad I feel the most at peace about this decision. I am watching her turn from a little girl into an incredible women. I have noticed that the decisions she is making are very thought out and she seeks the Lords instruction on them. I'm very proud of her but will miss her more than she will ever know.

My new normal is "Change". I have never been very good at change. I still am not. I am learning day by day. There are moments where I have to will myself to keep going and not sit and cry all day, and then there are days like today when I burst into tear at the very thought of my new normal. I keep telling myself that this change is good. It is what I have been preparing my kids for, for 18 years. I know that in order to grow I need to change...I can't stay still, I must keep moving, but today is a day that I will not go very far. Today is a day that I will cry most of the day. Today is the day that I look back and remember my girls as little girls and not women. Today I don't like the new normal, but tomorrow is a new day. Thank you Lord for new days. Thank you for always helping me though.

Resolutions....In June

OK. So, normally I am not big on setting New Year's resolutions but I have been convicted in so many ways in the past 6 month that I need to write down some goals that I am working on and need to work on. With 5 kids, one moving out, one going to college, one graduating next year, a 2 year old and a precious 10 month baby girl I am in desperate need to get organized!
So here I go I’m putting it out there for all to see. These are just a few of the many things I will be working on the next 6 months. Please feel free to ask me how I'm doing...I’m big on holding someone accountability.

~ Wake before my children, get up and get ready (This is a big one for me)
~ Eat healthy foods, not so much processed or things with added sugars
~ To schedule a time once a month to get out alone
~ Schedule a time to get out once a month alone with David
~ Plan dates with older girls to do something one on one regularly
~ Plan at least one activity to do with my children once a week
~ Go to the library with the kids once a month
~ Read a new book every month
~ Practice signing once a week (using my book or YouTube videos)
~ Take the kids outside three times a week
~ Update birthdays and purchase cards for the whole year and send them out on time
~ Read through the book of John twice before BSF begins
~ Exercise three times a week-(ex: walking, going to the Y, working in the yard)
~ Drink at least 3 glasses of water and work up to 8
~ Memorize scripture at LEAST a verse a month

Philippians 4:13
I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

NeW KiNd OF NormAL

As I sit down to finally blog after several weeks, I ponder over how different my life is. David just left to go play basketball....Jelissa is house sitting at the Batchelders....Kristie is house sitting for Nikki....Lakeisha is hanging out with friends after spending all day yesterday at Eliches with friends(alone).... and I'm home with two little babies watching Cynthia discover the joy of learning to stand, and Darius playing with his, new to him, Rescue Hero Men.

I have often wondered about God's since of Humor and looking at my life some days I know for sure He has one.

I've loved watching my girls grow up and become women....I love being a mom to Darius and Cynthia....I love being the wife to my very best friend, David....I love working with the kids at church....And I love serving the Lord with all my heart....but there are days when I sit back and think about just how tired I am and whether I have anything left to give. Is this a normal feeling?

AND THEN GOD SAYS

READ WHAT I CAN DO----READ WHO I AM

PSALMS 23:1-6

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside quiet waters,

he restores my soul

(I love that part)

He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil, you rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

(I can't even count the days I've needed that comfort)

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows

( I have so many blessings that my cup does indeed overflow)

Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

(This is exactly where I want to be forever)

Now those are words that energize me. Knowing that I can do all that I need to do with God's strength helps me keep going....even when I have days when I want to just go back to bed and give up, God will comfort me and guide my path.